#79: Shelby Hamilton

"I started reading 'A Course in Miracles' a few years ago but left it in a hotel room on purpose."

Dec 14, 2025

Shelby Hamilton (@meowshelbs2) is an artist and former fashion blogger/model. You may remember her as Meow Shelbs.

#79: Shelby Hamilton
Aries/Pisces/Aquarius
Auckland, NZ

What does health, or being healthy, mean to you?

Being honest about who you are and where you’re at — struggles and all. Having no filter between you and your experience of life, so no drugs. Touching grass. Sunbathing. Moonbathing. Exploring your unconscious. Going to therapy. Sleep hygiene. Kissing. High alkaline water. Asking for help. Accepting reality. Flushing out toxins. Crying when I need to cry. Having a sense of what is right and what is wrong. Organic foods and materials. Being gentle with myself. Being in tune with the natural rhythms of my cycle and my body. Keeping my hair a little greasy instead of washing it right away. Clean bed sheets. Not over-exerting myself. Cleansing your doors of perception. Telling myself, “I love you.”

How would you describe your current lifestyle?

Terra incognita. Transformative. Gentle. Repetitive. Painful at times. Structured. Working on building a solid, confident base for myself — internally and externally. Eye-opening. Humbling. Anti-inflammatory. Quietly revolutionary. And genuinely quiet. I like silence whenever I get the chance. Pilgrimage. Therapeutic. Alchemical. Honest. Rehabilitating. Nourishing. Orphan/hero’s journey. Psychological composting.

How do you start and end your days?

Start: Wake before my alarm that’s there for “just in case.” Lie there for a moment. I don’t have an alarm set on my days off. Take my phone off airplane mode and check it briefly. I try not to check it, but I think most days I do. Shakti mat for at least 10 minutes.

Drink about 700 mL of room-temperature water from a glass water bottle.

Shower. Brush my hair. Spray organic rose hydrosol face mist (bought in bulk and decanted) on my face. Massage oil blends I make myself with organic ingredients like camellia oil and blue tansy oil on my face, neck, arms, and legs. Apply Noosa Basics Coconut & Vanilla deodorant. Zinc sunscreen on my face. Get dressed. Head to the kitchen and make breakfast.

At the moment, breakfast is two or three fried eggs in butter with salt and pepper — really runny yolks. I like to eat them with a spoon and mostly with my hands. I basically eat the same thing every day with varying spices or condiments, depending on what my weekly or monthly fixation is. At the moment it’s extra butter on top of the eggs and lots of chili flakes. I don’t need coffee. If I’m working that day, I make lunch to take with me. At the moment I am fixated on making banana pancakes for my midday snack. I dissolve a 1/4 teaspoon of Superfeast Tremella powder in a cup of hot water and drink that. I take one Superfeast Ashwagandha and one reishi supplement. I was taking milk thistle as a supplement for a month or so, but I just threw all of them out because apparently you don’t need them, and they can contain estrogen. I try to sit outside or lie down on the floor and do “constructive rest” pose for my psoas for 10, 20, or 30 minutes depending on how much time I have before I walk or catch the bus to work.

End: Dinner with my partner. Shower or magnesium flake bath with a bath soak that contains lavender, baking soda, vitamin E, apricot kernel oil. Soaking in magnesium chloride — not Epsom salts — is very important. I drink a cup of “dream weaver” tea, which is a dream-recall tea made from mugwort leaf, damiana leaf, valerian root. We have red lights throughout the whole house. I like to lie in bed or look out the bedroom window at the end of the day to watch the sunset. The sun goes down so late here in summertime. Before bed I read sometimes. Sometimes I talk to ChatGPT. At night if I’m looking at a screen, I wear blue-light-blocking glasses. I just finished reading The Hobbit. I want to read Lord of the Rings and watch all the movies while I am in New Zealand. Sometimes I lie on my Shakti mat on my bed. I’m pretty strict with my bedtime. For sleeping, I use a silk eye mask, organic beeswax earplugs. I “plug myself in” by laying my grounding blanket on my stomach, and to fall asleep I breathe and do body scans while using this gadget called a Sensate.

Can you recall a moment when you became more aware of your health, or your relationship to it changed?

When I was a teenager, I was obsessed with photos of smoothies, coconut water, and fresh fruit on Tumblr, and I would replicate that same style in my own images. I’d go to this cafe by the beach called Mojo’s because they had the best smoothies. My friends and I would buy watermelon and coconuts and eat them on the beach and take photos of ourselves.

Since then, I’ve been into funky supplements, healthier options, esoteric healing modalities — but in a kind of superficial, sporadic way. I’ve always loved health food stores, they’re my favorite place to go. But it was just here and there. I’d be completely hungover and feeling like I was on death’s door, then decide to drink an organic, freshly squeezed ginger, beetroot, carrot juice or some activated charcoal to try and counteract all the poison. It would only ever be a desperate, whimsical aid on top of all the mess, so it wasn’t fully formed — which I find offensive and pointless, but it’s also human. So I have compassion for myself there.

I started gradually waking up about five or so years ago. One day, I heard a voice in my mind that said to me, “pink and blue when I’m with you.” It stuck with me, and from there I began to follow that rhyme. I became fixated on the “inner marriage” and anything to do with the concept of marriage: unconscious/conscious, feminine/masculine. Pink and blue symbolizes harmony and balance to me. Both and all. Everywhere that I saw pink and blue together, I kept close to my heart. It’s my sign from the guardians to let me know that I am on the right track, that God is watching. After that, I just went crazy with my art making and used that theme for practically everything for years. I still do to this day. It’s my anchor.

Throughout this phase, I was still insane. I was moving forward, but I was still using a lot of troubling things to cope. For a while, I was smoking weed all day, every day. On one hand, the weed helped me get through life, but ultimately it was keeping me stuck. It protected me and saved me from a lot of pain, but it also disconnected me from the problems I needed to address. You can only run for so long before it all starts to catch up to you.

Life started to get even crazier, and two years ago now is when I woke up for real. It was after I was introduced to someone who spoke to my soul, inspired me to snap out of my bullshit life, and really start taking care of myself and take my life seriously. He showed me something called the Rosarium Philosophorum, which is a nearly 500-year-old alchemical text, and that — alongside talking to him — really transformed my life. Before this, I was severely mentally and physically ill. After that awakening, I stopped using weed, Zoloft, alcohol, cigarettes, cocaine, molly, eating processed foods, and did everything I could to cancel out all of the stuff that was harming me. I just went inward. I went down to the source. I started going to therapy. Now I am currently in the depths of a nigredo.

I think God/the Word/The Truth/The Holy Spirit and art really saved my life. Present day, there are moments where I can’t believe how healthy and clean I am now. Something just awoke from the depths of me, and I haven’t looked back since. (Well, sometimes I look back and want to go back to my old ways because they seem comforting, and I feel scared of the unknown, but I know that I have to keep moving forward. I’ve come too far. And a bit too far out now.)

Do you have a spiritual practice?

I try to be faithful to God. I think my spiritual practice is the fear of God and feeling apprehensive about living out of alignment with that, because I’m well aware of the damage that does to your soul — and in turn, your life (been there, done that).

I pray. I really like going to church in a cathedral or practicing zazen in a zendo, but I also like food and herbal medicine and going to the beach. I try to practice taking care of myself; I’m learning how to protect myself and how to do the right thing by myself and others. I have Christian and Zen priests that I talk to. I feel inherently spiritual because of the beauty and awe I experience throughout every day of living and being awake. It’s all beautiful, even the ugly stuff. It’s nice to be awake and not trying to run away anymore. It’s hard to deny that there is a creator or a law or purpose we serve which is deeper and greater than we can comprehend. I live a very blessed life.

What’s your relationship to self-healing?

I am still learning what it means to self-heal and listen to my intuition and what my body truly needs. I am in awe of anyone who dedicates their life to helping and healing others.

I don’t think doctors have all the answers — just like alternative medicine doesn’t either. I think we need both. Sometimes I don’t believe we need to use as much medical intervention as we do, but I still respect it and use the medical system when I need it.

📒 Have you submitted to the Provider Directory?

A good, consistent diet and lifestyle has solved a lot of my problems. Even at my lowest points and when I was my unhealthiest, I would avoid antibiotics when I had the flu or a cold. I would always naturally cure myself with ginger, turmeric, lemon, and honey broths, olive leaf extract, echinacea, lots of water, rest, and eucalyptus steam bowls for my airways. My family has always thought I was crazy with this stuff because they’re not like that, so I’m the black sheep in that way.

I find so many neat tricks from other people and healers on the internet.

I’m open to experimenting with all different kinds of practitioners. I’ve been inspired to visit an acupuncturist next, after receiving some dry needling at my physiotherapy appointment a few months ago— although practitioners and doctors can only take you so far. I’m working on eventually becoming some kind of crone and wise mother to myself. Most of my healing work is for my body, mind, and spirit to be open enough and plugged into the channel where I can receive all the wisdom I need to know.

Do you work with any practitioners, texts, or modalities on a regular basis?

I go to therapy weekly. I see a beautiful Reiki master and intuitive woman at the moment. The Rosarium Philosophorum. 12-Step workbooks. I started reading A Course in Miracles a few years ago but I left it in a hotel room on purpose. I would be interested in getting into that again. Women Who Run with the Wolves is such a helpful book when you’re going through a psychological descent. I’m looking for more texts like this. I talk to my partner about everything that’s going on for me all the time, and my friends too. Mother Hunger has been on my reading list for years now. I’m really craving a girly book to read.

When do you feel the most nourished?

I can’t wipe the smile off my face when I’m swimming in the ocean, so at the beach, under the sun, by a body of water. I feel nourished after finding clarity or having a breakthrough. After a good night’s sleep. I stood in the pouring rain yesterday and it was exhilarating. After a good therapy session. The Ashwagandha and Reishi that I have been taking has done wonders for my nervous system. I also eat delicious food everyday.

How do you reset?

I ask God to clear away all the unwanted energy and gunk I’ve accumulated over the moon cycle, or the week, when I’m bathing or having a swim in the ocean. I intuitively know how to reset and when. It’s a little different each time. I use rosemary oil to cleanse and “exorcise” unwanted energy or build-up in my system because it’s known for exorcisms. Washing my hair and shaving my legs is a reset. Water. Speaking of which, I need to do a fast. I also want to try this soup fast I saw online to give my digestive system a break soon.

Do you have a favorite meal? What do you keep in your fridge/pantry?

My favorite meal is cake. I just want to eat toast and butter at the moment. I always have beef in my fridge or freezer. Eggs. Avocados. Salt. Olive oil. Butter. I go through phases where I hyper-fixate on certain foods. A few weeks ago it was heirloom tomatoes and I ate so many with every meal that I can’t stand the sight or thought of them anymore. It depends what is in season and what jumps out at me. I love oranges and sweet potatoes right now.

What advice would you give to your younger self?

I’d like to say to her: stop doing a lot of the shit you’re doing and get some help. Stop using drugs. Stop medicating yourself. Don’t sleep with anybody you don’t love. Take care of yourself. Surround yourself with people who care about you. Tell the truth about your suffering. I want to give my younger self so much advice and help her with so many things. I wish I could save her, but I feel ambivalent about wanting to go back and change things for her because I don’t want to mess with God’s plan, and there’s wisdom in my journey even though it’s been hella difficult and soul-crushing at times. But I’ve also been taught that “in filth it will be found.” The philosopher’s stone will be forged from and in the darkness, if you know what I mean.

To the person reading this?

I don’t really have any advice for others. You’ll find what resonates with you and know what to do when the time comes.

What would you like to see or create more of in the world?

More based women. Fewer girl-bosses. Fewer hormone disruptors!

More women cultivating healthy relationships with themselves and with men. Women healing their injured instincts and reconnecting with their natural rhythms. Pink and blue. People going deeper. More crowning of nature. More babies, no daycares, and less mother-hunger. More presence and nervous-system regulation. More of my art everywhere. More gangsta shit.