My mum Julie is the most abundantly loving person I know. She was born in a small town in Quebec, traveled the world, trained as a classical pianist, and then as a speech-language therapist. After meeting my dad, she moved to New Zealand with him to have my brother, and I grew up in a smaller and warmer country. She really embodies joyful warmth and a nurturing spirit. She is always welcoming stray friends to the family dinner table, dropping me off blessed pumpkin seeds, second-hand wool jumpers, and stews. She gives every facet of her life the same kind of care, love, and enthusiasm.
Since my brother and I moved out of home, she has thrown herself into life in a very inspiring way. She’s started painting, drawing, doing pottery, joined her church choir, and cycles everywhere avidly. I think we can all take something from mum’s approach to life, and tap into the endless well of beauty and divinity she seems directly connected to. Recently, she sent me a message saying, “I feel close to you when we are online together.”
I caught my mum near the end of Lent, which led us to discuss her relationship to her Catholic faith, which is very intertwined with her intuitive and joyful approach to health.
Mom Gossip: Julie by Romily
Auckland, New Zealand
How does your faith influence your life?
My faith is at the center of everything, completely. It’s like a sun inside me. I live on earth, but I feel very connected to another invisible world. Everything brings me back to it: you, my children, people around me, my workmates, my friends, my sisters, music, art, nature. Walking inside churches where so many others pray settles my eyes and my soul.
I pray a lot, especially on my bike. I always start with, thank you for protecting me on the road this morning, thank you for looking after me, always. Then I think of you, protect Romily, stay with her, and the same thing for your brother, for everyone. I thank God for always making His presence felt to me. I don’t know how to describe it, but it’s like a cuddle, like the feel of a merino or cashmere sweater. I think that if you can feel the pleasure of a merino or cashmere sweater, you can feel the pleasure of God’s cuddle.
How has your faith evolved throughout your life?
Enormously. When I was a little girl, I had a lot of faith, or a strong connection with Jesus; I think the word “faith” doesn’t quite translate what it is about the feeling of being touched by almighty love. But my connection faded when I grew up. I stopped connecting with it because it felt a little naff, and I didn’t see anything I liked in the religion as it was being practiced. When I arrived in New Zealand, I met a lot of Māori people, and I loved the way they lived in their faith. When you and your brother arrived in my world, it was one of the biggest shocks of my life. I was like, oh my gosh, wow! I remember seeing you and being so in love with you. I cried, you’re so beautiful, it’s incredible. It was clear to me that it wasn’t just me who did that. You were like little gifts from the sky.
I’ve always known that before I was conscious of my faith, or my connection to God, I felt like I had a petite joie in me. Since I started going to mass again, it’s clear to me where this joy comes from. Everything I do is informed by something else. It can be a bit contentious to talk about my connection with God, so I go very gently with it. People at my work see me come in with a rosary wrapped around my bike, they think it’s funny and that it looks quirky and cute. I like this. It’s approachable. Having lovely, soft, and gentle connections with people around me makes me feel good. It gives me a lot of hope.
How did your approach to health and existing in the world change when you moved from Quebec to New Zealand?
Well, I’ve never liked processed food; it’s always made me feel sick. When I lived in Grand-Mère as a child, I didn’t have much choice because it was such a small town. My mother only ever made good meals. We occasionally went to A&W, or to get hot dogs at a local shop called Chez Auger. When I moved to Montreal, I discovered an organic shop called Frenco’s on St. Laurent Boulevard that sold things in bulk: tofu, organic peanut butter, veggie patties. I’d never seen anything like it before.
I loved moving here because food is made on a much smaller scale. In North America, when you walk into the supermarket, and it’s minus 40 outside, and you see a pineapple or a passionfruit, you think, that’s not right! Everything in New Zealand, everything, was so crispy and fresh. Fresh fish was extraordinary, the milk tasted so much better. Now, they’ve added permeate, so you need to buy raw milk if you want it to taste good. When I arrived in New Zealand in the 90s, all the milk tasted like that, the meat, everything was so good. I felt people had a different kind of care. I liked that there was wine made here. I think that wine is good for you. I have one glass of wine when I feel stressed, and I’m cured. It’s amazing.
How did you get into the realm of organic food?
Good question. I think I used to read underground newsletters about it in Montreal. In Grand-Mère, we had one organic food shop that my mother would laugh about, saying they sell things for three times the normal price! But I went inside, and looked around like, wow, it’s enlightened in here! I loved it, and I bought incense from them. I think that was my first contact with organic food.
It’s very important that you don’t put honey in boiling water, it’s a living organism! My pinkie is always my guide for temperature.
When I think about what you do for your health, it all seems very intuitive to me. You really just do things that make you feel good.
Yes, I eat fruit and vegetables every day. I always have some apples in my lunchbox. I feel like it cleanses my body. Now and then, I hear about a new fad, and I’m always so excited to try it. Like my turmeric tea with honey. I put my milk in my cup, I put my honey in it, a little turmeric, saffron and pepper, then a little bit of warm water inside to dissolve. It’s very important that you don’t put honey in boiling water, it’s a living organism! My pinkie is always my guide for temperature.
I always drink lukewarm beverages. It just makes me feel so good! I feel like the warm water goes everywhere in my body. It’s a strange and beautiful thing.
What do your mornings look like? What are the things you do that make you feel good and ready to start your day?
I get up, and I always look at the sunrise. I take pictures of it every morning. I do a prayer, I thank God for giving me a good night of sleep, even if it wasn’t very good. I thank Him for giving me a good job where I can be late without issue. I always have to massage my eyes with a flannel and warm water, and I like to stretch while I do it. It feels good to look after the gift of seeing.
I wash and alternate between hot and cold water quite often when I’m getting ready in the morning. I like to keep my face wet when I apply my creams, they feel like barriers around me. Then I like to put a little natural foundation around my nose and eyes, and I love to put a little rouge around my nose.
Then I brush my teeth, but I don’t actually brush my teeth, I brush my cheeks, my tongue, even underneath. I don’t want to wear my enamel, I want to keep my teeth forever. At night, I brush them very thoroughly, but I don’t eat anything at night, so why should I brush them in the morning? I’ve been doing it for years and I don’t have any cavities. My teeth are very strong.
I then often get into the bath and wash my feet. It does me so much good to put hot water on my feet in the morning. It is a humble thing to do.
After that, I do my morning yoga. I love it.
When I get dressed, I always have to wear things I feel comfortable in. I only buy secondhand clothes with natural fibers. All the chemicals they put in new clothes are gone when you buy them secondhand; they’ve already been softened! I find it so boring to go into a shop to buy brand new clothes.
When did you start doing yoga?
When I was studying music at university, I did yoga classes. Yoga and swimming were the only physical courses we were allowed to do because they didn’t want us to hurt our hands. I loved it. I’ve done yoga all through my life. I’ve never gone to the same class religiously, but in my own way, I’ve found something that works for me.
I also bike to work every single day, rain or shine. I don’t want to worry about parking. I feel so nimble on my bike, I feel as if I am flying above everyone! I’m very fortunate, I feel loved by the sky. I feel as if the sky is looking after me, and I would never want to be complacent about that.
What are some things you do when you get home to finish your day?
I don’t have very good routines when I get back home. I go on my Facebook, I waste a lot of time on it. I love to watch baby reels and my Catholic reels. I love my Catholic reels.
I eat the same thing almost every week: a lot of eggs, organic chicken liver once a week, red salmon, and little strips of steak. After dinner, I’ll do pottery, draw, and write in my journal, which I do very frequently. I drew your apartment recently, but it’s not very good.
I’ll practice my piano or my choir songs. I always do yoga before bed, it prepares me so well for sleep. I do little prayers when I’m in bed. I thank God for my day, and ask him to protect everyone I love.
After dinner, I’ll do pottery, draw, and write in my journal. I drew your apartment recently, but it’s not very good.
How is Lent changing your daily routines?
I eat a lot more moderately, I pray more, I give more to the less fortunate, especially women I see on the street. Lent is about three things: fasting, praying at your weakest moment to connect with God, and practicing generosity. (I started fasting at the beginning of Lent, and I felt very fatigued; I re-read the regulations and they say that after 60 you shouldn’t fast anymore, so I stopped.) During Lent, time seems to slow down. I took the week off work to slow it even more.
Lent allows me to think more about God and Jesus’s life. It’s about loving others like ourselves. To me, this means we have to start by loving ourselves, warts and all. Forever forgiving. When I am trying to improve myself for the sake of solely feeling better, the feeling it gives me soon wears off. But if I’m doing so to be better at distributing God’s gifts, it feels everlasting.
When do you feel at your healthiest?
When I slow down and take the time to do what counts for me. Connecting with my family, organizing nice means to commune on. To look after my children, giving them food and going out with them. Listening to my children’s wisdom, they are so full of it. Going to mass every week, and more if possible. Meditating on the sacred texts we read in mass. The Psalms are so incredible! When I do my hobbies, especially when I practice my choir’s Gregorian music. When I am physically active and look after my earth vehicle. When I am in nature, when I eat well, when I write in my diary…
What an extraordinary sage like woman. Thank you so much Reminds how your substack far and away the absolute best 🙏🌸
Truly inspiring ! Loved every word.